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Last updated: Monday, December 22, 2008

Adoption Options–where Do I Start?
By Larry Denton, Fri Dec 9th

Children are a special gift full of love, hope, joy, andadventure. Child adoption is a wonderful option when it comestime to increase the size of your family. Thousands or peopleadopt children each year and both they and the children benefitfrom it greatly. It is, however, not a decision to be madelightly. Are you emotionally ready for a life-time commitment?If you are adopting because of an infertility problem, have youresolved that issue? Is your home large enough? Are youfinancially capable of raising a child? Do you really want theresponsibility of being a parent? These questions, and manymore, need to be answered before proceeding with the adoptionprocess.

At times, the adoption process can seem complicated, timeconsuming, and even frustrating. However, there are manyresources available to help prospective adoptive parents as wellas for those women who are looking for assistance in givingtheir child a better life. The decision to place a child foradoption is an extremely difficult one. It is an act of greatcourage and much love. Remember, adoption is permanent.

Children do not need “perfect” parents–they simply need one ormore committed individuals who are willing to meet their basicneeds and allow them to become part of a nurturing familyenvironment. Finding your “ideal” child, who is available foradoption, can take some time. Each and every adoptive parent hastheir own mental picture of what they want their child to be.The more specific you are with your ideal child, the harder itwill be to find him or her. But no matter what child you adopt,you will end up loving him or her just as much, because allchildren are a special joy.

There are basically two types of adoptions: confidential andopen. In a confidential adoption, the birth parents and theadoptive parents never know each other.

Adopting parents aregiven some background information about the birth mother and thefather so that they may better take proper care of thechild–such as medical histories.

Using an open adoption method, the birth parents and theadoptive parents know something about each other. In the leastopen, the birth mother reads about several possible families andpicks the one that sounds best for the baby. In the most opentype, the mother and the adoptive parents share names,addresses, telephone numbers and actually stay in contact withone another through the years.

The second major decision concerning adoption concerns thequestion, “Where will the child come from?” Again, there are twooptions. You can adopt a child born in the United States, calleda domestic adoption, or you can choose to adopt a child fromanother country, referred to as an inter-country adoption. Ifyou choose the second option, you must then decide from whichcountry your child should come–sometimes a very difficult, butvitally important decision.

No matter what type of adoption you choose to pursue, rememberthat this is a legal proceeding and must be finalized in court,although the process varies from state to state. Adoption is alife-long process, and you and your new addition are sure tohave many questions along the way. “Why did Mom give me up?”"Who is my real Dad?” These are real and important questionswhich must be answered by those involved, but adoption is trulya great opportunity for everyone involved. With adoptionseveryone wins!

About the author:Larry Denton is a retired history teacher having taught 33 yearsat Hobson High in Hobson, Montana. He is currently VicePresident of Elfin Enterprises, Inc., an Internet businessproviding useful information and resources on a variety oftimely topics. For a court room full of information, resourcesand advice about aoptions, visit http://www.AdoptionAide.com

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